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Thursday, May 25, 2006 at 2:19 PM

just curious about some stuff.... where am i heading to? i mean, in terms of my life and stuff... feel kinda aimless though... for starters, studies.... who doesnt wanna do well?? i know i do... but the thing is, i'm not exactly very smart or something so i dare not aim for certian grades cuz i'm afraid tat i cant make it... i guess i juz wanna avoid disappointment at the end of da day... i try not to take things to seriously sometimes cuz i dun wanna end up feeling hurt or disappointed.... juz feel tat things arent going tat well recently... studies, frenz, health etc.... is it luck or is it me? tat i didnt put in enough effort to make my life work? ok i shan't lament on my studies as i will have myself to blame as i have most of the control over it... but how about people?? i can't control people... i can't predict people, i can't.... i juz can't ok? i can't do anything about it... there's only this much i can do....like putting in the effort to keep my frens, but the rest is beyond me....feel like i'm losing my frenz one by one...its like even harder to maintain things as time goes by... like i'm losing my source of comfort....i dun wan tat.... its not easy to find some one u can connect to naturally(ok excluding "the other half" as it is even harder to find). and its even harder trying to MAKE urself connect with someone...

haiz... ok i guess this is the only thing which i can't have control over... omg...life sucks.... juz thinking of the future makes me feel that life is gonna suck more... its so tiring la... why are we even living anywaes.... gosh.... feel stressed to know that right now, i dun see any future for me....

hmmm...anywaes, on a lighter note, went out with jan to watch over the hedge on tue... feel shortchanged when i pay to watch a cartoon but its overall quite nice... the characters so cute lor!!!haha... and on wed i went with my bro to watch xmen3.... we booked tix cuz scared there will be loads of pple... em, the movie was ok la... like there was no climax in the show...i think the first 2 movies was better.... hmmm.... going to watch it again on sat with rahayu...and da vinci code.. gosh...movie galore!!! "she's the man" by amanda bynes is also coming out and "just my luck" by lindsay lohan is opening soon too!omg...so many movies, so little money...and time... why does everything have to come out at the same time???i have been deprived of movies some time ago and now i'm submerged in them... life... alwaes so unbalanced....

I'll play for you.